


heart hope

by luciferTM



Category: New Dangan Ronpa V3: Everyone's New Semester of Killing
Genre: Gen, Unhealthy Coping Mechanisms, V3 spoilers, as in do not read any further, the ending in particular, there are various ways to interpret this, this is NOT selfc-st just so we are absolutely clear
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-09
Updated: 2018-05-09
Packaged: 2019-05-04 11:13:50
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 785
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14591802
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/luciferTM/pseuds/luciferTM
Summary: [ V3 SPOILERS ]The second time Supreme Leader Ouma Kokichi dies, it’s about 8 o’clock in the evening.





	heart hope

**Author's Note:**

> huge thanks to [lynne](http://archiveofourown.org/users/silpium) for betaing and being the sweetest per usual
> 
> i'm currently writing a postgame kokichi longfic, and my brain came up with this drabble in the middle of the night. it didn't fit into the (much more optimistic) narrative i had planned for him in that wip, so i decided to post it separately.
> 
> title is from [this song!](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8PxNachuC50)

The second time Supreme Leader Ouma Kokichi dies, it’s about 8 o’clock in the evening. The animalistic heat of summer has crawled its way into the corners of his room, and Kokichi is looking out the window, the whir of the fan reminiscent of the cicadas cries he has shut away behind the glass.  
He needs to get up. Get out. Make something of himself.  
He reaches out inside of him to find that part of himself that took part in bringing about Danganronpa’s downfall, no more than a guiding whisper inside Saihara’s ear or red-stained scribbles in Momota’s hands. He feels a presence. A silhouette, painting the summer white.  
He would never admit to making his own shadow tangible enough to bleed through this plane of existence. They wouldn’t understand-- they’d only see an illusion to be torn through. But he has never cared much for others’ definition of reality. It helps, and that’s all that matters.  
As long as it remains his secret, he can keep it by his side. 

The Supreme Leader encourages him without fail. He knows that the person he has been would not be so kind toward himself. At times he thinks that the _dictator_ disappeared and the _leader_ he never got to be remained, for him, through him. Being able to see it is the sign that something is changing.  
There’s a part of him that still wants more; there’s a part of him that still responds.  
The few pounds Kokichi has lost since the game aside, they look perfectly identical. It’s easy to picture The Supreme Leader taking up more space than Kokichi does as he moved around and about. Jumping on the bed, clicking his tongue at the cluttered mess of clothes on the floor, singing with his legs swinging as he sits on the desk, laying down next to him when Kokichi can’t fall asleep. Kokichi moves to make room, or thinks himself move-- he doesn’t need to turn his head to see him. He doesn’t need to speak to speak to him. Once, the Supreme Leader held out his hand, and Kokichi couldn’t help but to extend his to meet it. No one else is privy to the smile he had then. 

The Supreme Leader is cool, collected, concerned. He knows what Kokichi needs better than himself. _That’s enough of being a stick in the mud. Come play with me, will you? You can, you’ll see. I’ll walk you through it. Turn your phone off first._

Kokichi is always fiddling with his phone. That evening, it’s sticking with cold sweat to his palm. He scrolls to see something move, to keep his mind working. When he’s outside, a stream of words he can pace with his thumb is soothing compared to the wild flaring of people’s demands.

That’s when he finds it. The Supreme Leader is leaning against him, over his shoulder. 

_ouma kokichi meta:_  
_or why that dude is rly pathetic at the core and shitty in more ways than one, bcse i enjoy dissecting his complicated mess of a character and y’all conveniently brush those aspects of his chara under the rug so i thought i’d refresh everyone’s memory  
it’s my #take don’t like don’t read thanks_

_4 comments:  
how dare yOU DO MY TRASH SON DIRTY LIKE THIS jk thats actually a good analysis… welp im sowwy i like him still. never said i had good taste_

_yo can you not post your hate in the ouma tag some of us want to just appreciate him in peace_

_> that wasn’t hate tho lmfao i like him! maybe if you stopped stanning him like he was some kind of perfect baby boy uwu then you’d see that_

_Thank you for this. It’s rare to see this insightful an analysis of the darker parts of his character, even more so one that doesn’t romanticize them._

Kokichi clicks on the link.  
He reads the whole thing. It’s thorough, witty, chirurgical. He can’t tell to what extent it’s accurate, so it might as well all be. By the time he is done, the room is aglow with the pink light of the smoldering sun, and he’s burning alone. 

The Supreme Leader did not spare him a parting apology. He vanished in a silence that’s out of character-- yet all too familiar. 

He’s killed himself again, _(I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m sorry) but you killed me first, you did,_ he tells its flickering image. The lie he no longer believes but clings to just as well.

Flicker out.

The fan drones on. The phone he’s still holding shivers in his hand.

The voice inside him says,

_Killed me?  
You’re the reason I even lived at all._

**Author's Note:**

> please talk to me about postgame kokichi


End file.
